didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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