you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
