Joe is yelling at the trees again.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
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