So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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