ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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