WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
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So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
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When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
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