have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
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