I skipped work to stalk him.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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