Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
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