I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
