I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
