We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
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I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
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I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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