Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
