i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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