Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
