They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
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