ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Dicks are not precious.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
