White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Randomize
