Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Houston, we have a squirter
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
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