He told me they were just razor bumps!
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Randomize
