We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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