I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Randomize
