so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
