He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
