Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize