Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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