Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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