What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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