She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
