Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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