Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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