pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize