i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
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