Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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