Im at strip club and am horny
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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