I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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