Midget sex pt 2 tonight
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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