He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
