I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
I showed him my bush... on skype.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
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