Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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