what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I could make wine with my vomit
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize