You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
