Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Everclear isn't food dammit
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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