Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
