i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
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