Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize