My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
