Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
