have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
