I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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